Life - family - love (part 1 - life)

Been thinking a lot about everything. About life, family, and love.

About life:

Life is short - everyday I wake up, God challenged me with 1 question "Cynthia, what do you life for?"

Literally, when I open up my eyes every morning, God challenged me about how I use my life that day. Today. Tomorrow.

To be honest, I haven't got a long term plan. I've been walking day by day treading on unknown ground, not being able to see anything more than what's in front of me.

I remembered an illustration I heard in a sermon once, that life with God is like driving at night on a dark road. The only spot you can see is what your night light is capable of showing you. And more than often, that is what I've been experiencing in my life. Only rarely do I get to see a glimpse of a far future, but most of my days are filled with day to day realization that I don't have the ability to know what the far future will bring to my life.

So what is it about life?

What do I need to think about? How should I spend my life? What do I want to do with my life? Where am I going with my life?

I only know one thing: Life is short. And I want to know why God made it so. Why is it so short? If it's short then should I spent it on enjoyment - getting the most out of it. Or should I spend it for something else? What is it? Pain? I don't think so.

For a long while, I've been convinced that pain and suffering can never be the purpose of anyone's life. I don't believe that God is like that. Creating us just so that we can feel pain. I don't think He is like those roman citizens in the ancient world, who had taken an enjoyment watching people suffer. THe bible clearly says that He is not that kinds of god. He is loving - much more than we can ever comprehend or imagined Him to be.

So what is it about suffering?

Jesus suffered. Jesus our Saviour, our God, the only Way and Life. He suffered. But did He suffer for the sake of suffering? Why did He suffer for? Why would He want to spend His life suffering? Did He suffer all His life?

You know, when I think about it. Jesus took upon the first and foremost suffering when He came to this world. For He was the KING. He had authority, power and dominion over us. But He deliberately humbled Himself to come down for us. (Phil 2) Even if He didn't end up dying for us, I believe that first act of coming down was His first and foremost suffering.

But did He suffer?

If He was a fallen human like us (which He is), I think pride won't allow Him to keep silent about His condition. But did He suffer?

I don't think I ever read Him complaining, or saying anything that He "suffered" as we meant suffering. The Scripture said that HE was perfect.

So what type of suffering did He receive, really?

I don't think I can ever fully answer that. But I know - that even if He didn't say it or feel it, I know that Jesus suffered more than anyone could ever imagined. More than any human can bear. But He took it all upon Himself so that we can have access and relationship with God again.

So what is it about life?

Jesus had a purpose of His life. And for that purpose, He suffered for it. He suffered hard and took all the burdens Himself. He had disciples to share His burdens with, but they can only bear so much.. He suffered, but He endured.

So what is it about MY life?

Do I suffer? No I don't think so. I might've selfishly think that I am, but I'm not. I have so many blessings, comfort and enjoyment that I don't really need.

So what is it about my life?

to be honest, as I'm writing this post. I don't even know where I'm going with it. I'm writing this just to clarify, articulate and systematize my thinking.

What is it about my life?

one thing I know, is that i shouldn't waste it. And not wasting it does not mean that I will try as hard as I can to find what comforts, serves, and enslaves me the most. Not wasting it by saying no to things that I would naturally be controlled with which is comfort and things that stops me from going forward.

but what does that really means and looks like?

i don't know yet ..

but I'm reminded of a quote by a great man named Jonathan Edwards that he is: "resolved to live with all (his) might while (he does) live". And to live a life like that, I don't think that meant just sitting down doing nothing, serving oneself. But to actually work oneself "to the bone" and live with all our might while we do live. To keep on trying and living and moving forward regardless of what may come to stop us in the future or now.

Moving forward to where - you might ask?

Can I share a verse from Phil 3:12-

12 Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. 13 Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. 15 Let those of us who are mature think this way, and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal that also to you. 16 Only let us hold true to what we have attained.

17 Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us. 18 For many, of whom I have often told you and now tell you even with tears, walk as enemies of the cross of Christ. 19 Their end is destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. 20 But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, 21 who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself.

Towards Christ. Because only He has the poower to transform our lowly body to be like His glorious body. Not money, enjoyment or anything else. Sounds abstract and super hard? I think so. But I know that there's something in that that I'm not seeing. Something precious that I want to grab. That's why I'll be holding on to this faith.

Anyway, that's just a passing thought about life. Family-love will be continued on to part 2...